Sunday, July 04, 2010

Eyes That Sparkle


Maybe it has something to do with getting older, but I'm starting to see myself differently.
I've been noticing lately that I'm getting my Daddy's sparkle-ie eyes.
My Dad's eyes would sparkle when I walked into the room with a Frosty or dono or any other kind of goodie
That's the sparkle I'm talking about. 
I think Daniel makes my eyes sparkle instead of goodies and I'm cool with that. 

I went to a funeral yesturday.
A dear friend of Daniel's family passed away.
He always reminded me of my Dad but then again older retired engineers who wear suspenders tend to hold a soft spot in my heart. 
My Dad passed away 9 years ago on July 5th.
I haven't been able to celebrate July 4th properly since.
I always think this year will be different but not yet.
This funeral was rough for me. 
I slept in thinking I could get out of it.  Sleep it away.
But I just knew I needed to drag myself out of bed and go.
I'm happy I did; funerals are important.

Going to funerals and facing days that are hard for us is difficult.
Life is difficult, but we can always find a reason to celebrate.
  Today I want to celebrate that I now have sparkle-ie eyes.

love,
Fritzi

10 comments:

Amanda Atkins said...

Aw, Kat, I'm sorry that your friend died. This post is so touching. I think you're so brave for facing the things that make you sad. I hope that maybe today you have a celebratory fourth of july. Your dad is smiling down at you. :)
Lots of love,
Amanda

Mamushka Marie said...

I'm soo sorry to hear about your friend! I just went to my 2nd funeral in my life a few weeks ago and didn't want to go either. but i too am glad i did. glad to see a sparkle in your eyes! happy 4th love!
xo,
claire
mamushka marie

Katherine said...

This was such a sweet post. I thought of all of you yesterday during the funeral and have felt a big empty/sadness ever since I heard the news. I will be thinking about you tomorrow. I have that same soft spot for engineers.

lindsey said...

i love that photo of you. i am not a big fan of funerals either. my mom passed away almost 14 years ago. this post makes me think of the albert brooks movie, "my first mister." sending you tons of love.

xo

Amy said...

I'm so glad that you have a reason for your eyes to sparkle. Dan is a sweetheart just like your Daddy. It's hard to believe it has been 9 years. I love you.

Kristen said...

I'm not good at funerals. I've been to several of Dan's relatives and neighbors...mostly people I didn't really know too well. But I sit there and start thinking about when my mom and dad die, or about Dan or my kids. I start planning my own funeral in my head (no stuffy church one please) and I get all knotted up.

I know this weekend is hard for you. I think your daddy would want you to do something that would honor him and make his eyes sparkle. A doughnut for breakfast and a toast to a sweet man. He must be so proud of you K.

Maria said...

Kat, I'm so sorry about your friend and about how hard it is to celebrate the 4th. My dad died on Dec. 27, 1993 so Christmas has never been the same for me. I know how such a loss can effect you for years. I think every year that goes by gets just a bit easier but still never easy. Good for you for finding something sparklie, you deserve it!!
Love,
Maria

ilovemyhouse said...

Hi Kat. Sorry to hear that the 4th of July is hard to celebrate for you. I hope it get's better in time.It's brave that you went to the funeral. Thank you sooo very much for winning the giveaway but ALSO for the kinds words. Great timing. XX

Sam said...

You're right- going to funerals is important. It's important to celebrate and honor someone, even if it IS really, really hard. I love funerals in a church the best - it's somehow a million times more beautiful and comforting than a funeral home service. I really don't like funeral homes. Blech. They seem steeped in sadness.

I'm sorry this is a hard weekend for you. Anniversaries are so hard, I understand. Hoping that you treat yourself with love and tenderness today.

sueper said...

a lot of strength for you and Daniel! Hope your sparkley eyes will cheer him up!
x